The Tale Behind the Apocalypse

I’m sure you’ve heard about the apocalypse: the fact that the world is going to end in 2012. Well, this is the story behind that event. This tale either originated from the Aztec or the Mayan people.

Once upon a time, the world was full of human beings. The humans ate maize and grew into giants, but even these giants were unable to keep their heads above the water when a huge flood came. It swallowed the sun and ended the first age of the earth after 4,008 years. Nearly every giant on earth was drowned and turned into fish. But two humans survived by climbing the tallest tree.

These two people were called Nene and Tata and they started the human race all over again in the second age. But again, after 4,010 years, the world was destroyed again… this time by a great wind that came and blew out the sun. The wind blew so hard that humans had to cling to the trees with hands and feet and they even grew tails. They all turned into monkeys.

Again, two humans survived by standing on a rock. They started the human race off into the third age. After 4,081 years, the world was ruined by a great fire that destroyed the earth.

Of course, two humans survived and started the fourth age and, of course, the humans of the fourth age were wiped out by a rain of blood and fire. No food could grow and everyone starved.

…this brings us up to date – up to the fifth age, which is the one we live in now. The fifth age began in 3113 BC and will end with earthquakes on 21st December, 2012. So, start stocking up with tins of tomato soup and toilet rolls! I’m not really worried, as it’s probably never going to happen.

Still… I wonder who the two survivors will be?

Enjoy your 2012. Make it the best year yet.

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4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. HelenShroom
    Dec 31, 2011 @ 18:02:07

    Me and you, all the way Tan.

    And, the Aztec calender is a pile of bollocks. I don’t believe a word. Trust me, when it’s the 21st December, I’ll be listening to Apocalypse Please and laughing in the face of extremists.

    Reply

  2. Rosikifish
    Dec 31, 2011 @ 18:54:15

    Well it’s obviously me and my cat who survive :]
    It will also give me an excellent excuse to buy tonnes of tomato soup.

    Reply

  3. State Abbreviations
    Jan 03, 2012 @ 08:14:02

    Good idea, I’m gonna try it

    Reply

  4. Jeyna Grace
    Jan 03, 2012 @ 12:52:26

    LOL.. do you know that our calenders are back dated 4 years or so? We should be dead now. Haha! But if ppl insist, I’ll tell them i hope its a zombie apocalypse. Wouldn’t that be awesome?!

    Reply

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